Birthday vlog | How am I during the pandemic?

I still can't believe the whole world is fighting a virus. It's an enemy that's hard to kill. This morning as I was editing this vlog. I saw an article from Time that says, "Welcome to the First Global Economic Depression of Our Lifetimes". I was in state of shock just by seeing the title. In my mind, I keep saying "It can't be." But I know that we're slowly entering that phase. Later on I should read it so I know what will happen or at least get an idea on what will become our "new normal".



Looking back at first of week March, I was living a normal life - going out on the weekends, seeing my friends and not feeling scared that I might contract a very deadly and contagious virus. But here I am now living the "new normal" of our lives.

The first week of being quarantined and being told not to report for work was difficult to accept. Because how can I sustain my family? How can I pay for my bills? The list goes on.. But my main concern was "What's going to happen now? The whole world seems to be in a complete halt. How are we going to survive this pandemic?". I was very scared and worried because I didn't expect anything like this (NOBODY did and nobody was prepared for this kind of event). My anxiety instantly rose through the roof because it's not only about my job anymore. It's about the whole world too. Every time I pick up my phone, most headlines were about COVID-19 and city lockdowns. So I called my mom right away, told her the news and how I feel. I'm so thankful for my mom for comforting me. She told me instead of worrying about everything. I should try to use this time to hone my skills and turn to my hobbies again which has saved me. She's right. I have no control over this pandemic. The least thing I can do is to have faith, continue praying and try to occupy myself with my hobbies.

The advice from my mom really helped me to cope with my anxiety. The following week I promised myself to leave all the negativity behind and start fresh. Next think you know, I started doing what I love AGAIN - baking, cooking and sharing them here in my blog. I was able to try something different too which is vlogging. If you've been here since day one you probably noticed I wasn't really active the last two-three years. 

My husband witnessed how I suffered losing inspiration in the things that makes me happy and being creative. There were nights when I cried myself to sleep because I felt lost. I also experienced crying in front of my former colleagues because I was explaining to them I don't want to live my life by just only working. It's embarrassing but it happened to me. 

As much as possible, I wish to live a momentous life. I believe hobbies play an important role in our lives. They're therapeutic. Because let's all be honest, our work becomes our life. Sometimes we forget the little things that makes us alive. Yes, we have to work in order to live a comfortable life. But why do we let our hobbies slip away? I know there's a deeper explanation to this. If you have thoughts on this please comment it down below. 

I have a feeling when things go back to normal. I might not be active as I am right now. Before quarantine happened, I was only working and on weekends I catch up with house chores and get a rest in between.

But what's important right now is I'm trying to live my life during the pandemic. This is how I'm coping in my own little ways and it's helping me so much. I hope everyone is able to get out of their blackhole. I pray for those people who have lost their loved ones, their job and who are struggling to find positivity during these uncertain times. We will get through this :-)